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Мъжете са като... Плочки за пода - ако ги поставиш правилно първия път, можеш да се разхождаш върху тях с години.
Мъжете са като... Банкова сметка - без много пари не събират много интерес.
Мъжете са като... Миксер - трябва ти, но не си съвсем сигурна защо.
Мъжете са като... Шоколад - сладък, приятен и обикновено се лепят право за задните ти части.
Мъжете са като... Кафе - най-хубавите са богати (на вкус), топли и могат да те държат будна цяла нощ.
Мъжете са като... Рекламите - не можеш да вярваш на нито една дума, която казват.
Мъжете са като... Компютрите - трудни за разбиране и никога нямат достатъчно памет.
Мъжете са като... Хладилна чанта - зареди ги с с бира и можеш да ги заведеш където и да е.
Мъжете са като... Копирни машини - трябват ти за размножаване, и май това е всичко.
Мъжете са като... Държавни ценни книжа - трябва им дълго време да стигнат до състояние на зрелост.
Мъжете са като... Място за паркинг - хубавите вече са заети, а тези, които са останали са или (за) инвалиди или са прекалено малки.
Мъжете са като... Пуканки - удовлетворяват те, но само за малко.
Мъжете са като... Снежна буря - никога не знаеш кога ще дойде, колко сантиментра ще е и колко време ще продължи (издържи).
Мъжете са като... Банан - колкото по-стар става, толкова по-малко твърд е.
"Алооуу, чаровницееей, спри са да ти казвам, имйел шъ пулучиш! Голем късмет та чака, добър пръвайдър ша намериш!
Един юзър много хубави неща ти мисли. Все та причаква в кюто, ама ти много са крийш, ма! Пусни му на чиляка... оторизейшън, стига си го мъчила с тоз рикуест! Той много та аресва, иска да та джазка виртуално.
Я дай левътъ ръкъ да вида по-добре. Ауу, малка ръчичка имаш, ама голем джойстик си фанала! Въх, много си играйш със скролера на мишката, палавницееей. Немаш ли с кво друго да си играйш, ма?
Тука виждам голем трафик от един сайт с много хиксчета. Ама си ъпдейтвай aнтивирусната и файъруола да не си наджиткаш компа с виртуални въшки.
Дай ся пет лева и Господ да та пази барабар със софтуера и хардуера!
Къде тръгна, ма?
Шъ та кълна, да знайш!
Да ти са напълни компа с вируси дано!
Виндовса да ти висне кът гъза на прабаба ми!
Ре-инстал секи ден да прайш и от бъгове да не съ отървеш!
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Имйела със спам да ти затрупат!
Само грозни аватари да намираш!
Кюто ти да са скапе и хистърито да ти са затрий!
Сичките си пароли да забраиш и да ти спрат акаунтите"
За шефа
Шефът не флиртува - той обучава кадрите
На нов началник и на малко прасе не се радвай, защото не знаеш каква свиня ще излезе от тях.
Началник е човек, който е подранил, когато вие сте закъснели, и закъснява, когато вие сте подранили.
Всеки уважаващ себе си началник има две секретарки - по една за всяко коляно.
Шефът не спи, а си почива.
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Уважавай шефа си, че може да дойде и по-лош.
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Надписи върху опаковки
Американците наистина са много тъпи.Не питайте кой чете указанията върху опаковките,а кой ги пише!:))Ето и някой от лауреатите:)
На сешоар:"Моля,не ползвайте,докато спите!"(М да,това ми е единственото останало време да си суша косата:))
На пакетче чипс:"Спечелете много награди.Покупка не е необходима.Повече информация-в пакета":))
На луксозен сапун:"Упътване:Ползвайте като обикновен сапун."(Дано не ви е първия сапун!:))
На опаковка замразена храна:"Указания за употреба:Размаразете"(Ммммм,хитро!:))
На пакетиран десерт,отпечатано на дъното:"Не обръщайте"!(Късно,късноооооо:))
На полуготов пудинг:Продуктът ще бъде горещ след загряването му.(Не думай!:))
На ютия:Не гладете дрехите върху тялото!(Въпреки,че спестява време?:))
На детски сирп против кашлица:Не шофирайте и не работете с машини след употребата на лекарството!(Да,ще снижим доста броя на строителните инциденти след като разкараме 5 годишните от багерите!:))
На хапчета за сън:Внимание,може да предизвика състояние на сънливост!(Неееееееее:))
На опаковка с коледни светлини:За употреба само в помещения и извън тях!(А къде не може?:))
На пакет с ядки:Внимание,съдържа ядки!(Ще го има и в новините:))
На пакет с ядки:Инструкции:Отворете пакета:Яжте ядки!(Вдишайте,Издишайте...:))
На детски костюм Супермен:Носенето на този костюм не ви позволява да летите!(Върнете ни парите!:))
На моторна резачка:Не се опитвайте да спрете резачката с ръце или гениталии!(О,значи е имало опити?:))
26.08.2008 08:35
но не очаквай
да си коригирам поведението:))
26.08.2008 08:40
26.08.2008 15:00
Тилнет , не всеки има възможност да следи
всичко което излиза в нета .
Сърдечни благодарности :)))
Благодаря!
ketbaloo,благодаря:))
placebo,и на теб,за подкрепата:))
tomich,обещавам по леко да я карам:))
vishnichka,и аз благодаря:)
dete,прочети ги и на шефа и готово:)
vmir,няма защо:))
strianakiev ,нали знаеш,не е луд този,който яде зелника......:))
krotalka,очаквам разказите ти с нетърпение,защо спря да пишеш?
letisi, :))
27.08.2008 10:00
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